A Rogue River Tall Tale
as told by Captain Tim Brueckner
collected by S.E. Schlosser
Take a look over at this gravel bar on our left. It’s called Bony Point, and we saw something here the other day that I thought was kind of interesting so I thought I’d mention it.
You see where the gravel bar meets the tree line up there and how it forms those shadows? Well, standing back there in those shadows was a big old Sasquatch. And, this isn’t unusual, because we have a lot of Sasquatches down here. But, we had some people on board who had never seen one, so we idled down to watch.
Well, as we watched, after a little while, this old Sasquatch wanders across the gravel bar, wades out about hip deep in the water, grabs about a six foot sturgeon by the tail. He drags it up on the gravel bar, thumps it in the head with a big old rock and kills it.
Now, I don’t know why they do that. I’ve seen them do that before. Whether they actually eat the fish, or if it’s just for sport, I don’t know, because I’ve never really had a chance to follow up.
But, this is where it gets interesting, because while we’re watching this on the south, down out of the alders on the north side, comes a big old black bear, and I mean about as big a bear as we’ve seen yet this year.
Well, this old bear looks across the river, sees what’s going on, jumps in the river himself, swims right across the bow of our boat, gets out on the south side there, shakes like a big old dog, and jumps right on the back of that Sasquatch, and starts beating on him. I guess he wanted his fish.
Anyway, as you can imagine, that old Sasquatch beat a hasty retreat up into the hills and we thought that was the end of it –people quit taking pictures.
Well, moments later that old Sasquatch comes back down out of the hills, with a big old tree he’s pulled out by the roots and starts beating on the bear.
Well, Holy Cow, that put them into it. It was a terrible thing. They went at it tooth and nail. There was blood and fur flying. You could hear their teeth popping as they snarled, and growled, and lit into each other, and I mean I was afraid. I was scared they were going to kill each other – and I think they would have – if I hadn’t jumped in there and broke it up!
Yup, that was something…