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The Crystal Mountain
retold by
S. E. Schlosser

According to the latest reports, there is a crystal mountain residing somewhere in Wyoming. You can't see nothing of it, it being clear straight through. But folks hereabouts reckon its about three miles around at the base, on account of all the bones of birds which killed themselves crashing into the danged thing.

I know of one lad who was showing off for his girl. He was doing wheelies on his bike when he crashed right into the side of the crystal mountain and knocked himself cold. I hear his lassie married another man who was smart enough to avoided mountains, visible or invisible.

That danged crystal mountain is always messing up the huntin' in these parts. A friend of mine got a peach of a sight on a ten-point deer once, right in rifle range. But when he fired, his bullet didn't come anywhere near the dad-blame creature. What's more, the deer didn't even flinch; jest kept on grazin'. It took three or four shots before my buddy realized that that pesky crystal mountain was acting like one of them telescopes and had reflected the image of a deer from the other side of the forest!

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© S.E. Schlosser 1997 - 2008.

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